TITLE: The One With Joey's Award
SCENE: [Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe, Monica, and Rachel are hanging out.]
Rachel: So Pheebs, you know I was just at this batchelorette party and they had a cake that in the shape of a man's....thing-a-ding-ding, and I was wondering, what you'd thought of that: offensive or amusing?
Phoebe: I am not sure. Monica what do you think.
Monica: Sounds kinda tacky.
Rachel: Damn it! Well, I'll see if they'll cancel it and if not maybe we'll put eyes on the hootchies and we will just say it's some sort of weird elephant.
SCENE: [Rachel heads to the back to make the call as Joey enters.]
Joey: Hey! You guys! You're not gonna believe this! I just got off the phone with my agent...
Phoebe: Oh my God! (Joey looks at her.) I'm sorry, too soon. You go.
Joey: Okay. I got nominated for my part on Days of Our Lives!
Monica: Joey!
Phoebe: Good for you!
Monica: Congratulations! Wow! I can't believe you're nominated for an Emmy!
Joey: No-no.
Monica: Oh Soap Opera Digest award!
Joey: You guys tell me who you're nominating?
Rachel: That I'm going to be nominated.
Joey: I'm just saying, I think that while it's really cute and new and fresh, the beauty is a little dated.
Rachel: Oh no. I love the boy and I am excited about the girl.
Monica: This is huge! Who knew women could be so cute? I love it!
Rachel: Rachel, I love you. We just really need to talk about Joe.
Joey: Oh! Well, now I do.
Phoebe: Hey, Monica! I love you! You know, we've been friends since we were two.
Monica: Wow! Rachel's speech is pretty amazing.
Phoebe: Well, look out, Joey! They are about to announce the first ever daytime soap opera...
Monica: Oh! How exciting! I mean, what do you think?
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. But anyway, here's the thing. There is such a thing as becoming monodramatic.
Joey: Yeah, well!
Rachel: You know what? That's not the worst part. That was the most boring part. Joey, how about you share a look. Are you really there?
Joey: Yeah, I am. (Joey takes out his phone.)
Monica: Huh?
Rachel: This guy is really surprised that Monica has gotten this far! (Everyone laughs.)
Joey: But when it comes to being monodramatic, it's not just one thing! I am very gay! It is ridiculous that we still have so many stereotypical roles in sitcoms and on television! Well, we really need to get this conversation going about other roles like Monica's on This Is Your Life, Holly's on 22 Jump Street, or Tracy's on Two and a Half Men. There are many different aspects of a perfect example of this monodrama. I would love to hear all of your perspectives!
Rachel: Oh, so you're talking about gay-romance roles! I am definitely there!
Joey: Yeah, I am talking about such roles. But let's hear it again.
Phoebe: Okay, so are there roles like Monica on This Is Your Life?
Joey: Yeah, how about this character?
Phoebe: Okay, who is she?
Joey: She's the therapist. So basically she's a loving mother.
Phoebe: Really?
Joey: Very close, and she would love to take all of us along on a wonderful little trip to Colombia.
Phoebe: So that's...well, in the dark there is only dark. And it is about love. I want to get a room! And since I'm no longer a visual learner, could you help me out a little? I'm going to see if I can figure out what's inside.
Joey: Yeah, good idea.
Monica: A room?
Joey: Oh, that sounds like it would be fun. And I can tell you what's inside it.
Phoebe: A tunnel?
Joey: Oh, well, here goes...yes! Oh, my gosh!
Monica: Oh my God! That's so --
Joey: Oh, no! Oh, no!
Monica: Can you get me out of here?
Joey: I'll call Rachel.
Rachel: Well, I can see why you wouldn't want to jump into the guillotine. I'm not saying it's a good idea. But, hey, thanks for the advice.
Phoebe: Okay, we are into it. This sounds like an episode of Being Susan. (They both laugh.)
Joey: Okay, who's Monica?
Rachel: She's Rachel's sister.
Joey: Oh, the one with the giant butt.
Rachel: Joey, she's awesome. I love her. I would love to just be by her side and just be a regular person for a while. But I'm not having that right now.
Joey: There's a million things I would love to do in her life, but I can't tell you because I haven't experienced it. There's something that I want to experience, but it's not okay for me to tell you, because I don't know if it's allowed to be told. It's never OK to tell anybody that you don't know.
Monica: You're on a mission!
Joey: There is just something about the way women are portrayed on television, it is very de-luxe for me to be honest.
Rachel: You really think she's cool?
Joey: Yeah. She's going to be fine. She's not going to be out all night kissing guys. She's going to be just super cool.
Rachel: Oh my God! And, you're just trying to be manipulative and play it up like you don't want to hear it! You're just trying to save face! You're trying to win the moment!
Joey: I mean, really? She's going to go out for the first time in over three years with some guy with big black eyes?
Rachel: Huh?
Joey: Oh my God!
Rachel: Yeah!
Joey: Oh, my God!
Monica: See, that just made it worse!
Joey: Seriously, she's such a wimp. We have nothing to say to her now! She just feels so special to me! And then when I say "Special," it's only because I'm invested in her.
Monica: Look, she'll make a great therapist!
Joey: But it's all kinda fake.
Monica: Oh my God! Well, I think she's cool enough.
Joey: She's having a great time.
Monica: You know what? Look, I love her. She's very smart and mature and has incredible accomplishments. So I'm not even going to think about telling her that I don't know how to tell a story right now.
Joey: But I really, really think that's the issue. She has to see it in her face as a therapist. And I think that's her own personal thing.
Monica: That's the issue? That's so --
Joey: That's her own issue.
Monica: But then that's where the problem comes in, right? She feels like she's doing her job.
Joey: You see? Just by looking into that door, she sees herself being in control. And it's hard for her.
Monica: It is hard for her, but it is easy for us.
Joey: Well, this episode really became a great asset to my own self-understanding.
Monica: Well, I'm not an expert.
Joey: I'm an expert. I am kind of. I'm not exactly a psychologist. I feel like I have a fascination for the unconscious when it comes to mental health. I feel like when you get ready to do something, you can't help but think: What will this end up looking like? What will I do with myself when I'm done? I can't help but think what I'll do with myself if I do this and this. That's pretty much it. And I think my fascination with unconscious may be the thing that we --
Monica: H-h-hear me out.
Joey: Right. Because you know what, I think this is the perfect example of what we do with it and just put it in a way that it's right for her.
Monica: This will be in her relationship with Ben.
Joey: And if she doesn't know what she does with her own inner conversation, it could get her in trouble. Like, she might bring the guillotine down.
Monica: It would be so cool.
Joey: Like, this is not the best time to have a guillotine coming down on your head. It would just come crashing down on you. It's really scary. That's my point. People think they don't have the option. And I say, "No, we do. You don't have the option. You're here because you chose to do this. You can do it or you can just let this go. But don't put it in her head like you're going to kill her."
Monica: I-I agree. And I hope you can figure out how to take it from there, because that's really important.
Monica: Yeah. I mean, why not have an incredibly aggressive episode and then just figure out what it is that this episode was for you?
Joey: I'm not getting up on stage in a statement wig.
Monica: No, I know, but you're just going to add some extra crazy in there.
Joey: Right. That's what we have to do.
Monica: You've been so quiet about it!
Joey: It's like, just come out and tell us how to do this! We can do it.
Monica: Yeah, but I don't know if you're ready to do that.
*Joey: I really don't know.
Last active
December 1, 2019 20:38
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Save JossWhittle/7855a1f47aadd524e1d6b2ff839c53ce to your computer and use it in GitHub Desktop.
GPT-2 large (7.62 million param) with no fine-tuning, sampled using Nucleus Sampling https://arxiv.org/pdf/1904.09751.pdf with p=0.9.
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