Note: flag people: 旗人, is a Chinese term that means “bannerman”. It refers to the people who belonged to the eight Manchu banners 八旗 in the Qing dynasty, especially the Manchu ethnic group. The banners were administrative and military divisions that were based on the clan, language, and region of the Manchu people. The bannermen enjoyed privileges and status in the Qing society, and they served as soldiers, officials, and artisans. The term 旗人 can also be translated as “flag Man”, which is a literal translation of the two Chinese characters. Here it's used as an iconic name for the 'pure English'.
英国菜难吃是不是证明了穷人没有美食？ - 南无刀削帆布的回答 - 知乎
https://www.zhihu.com/question/620262370/answer/3209905996
不是的，这和穷人没关系。我一个马克思主义战士在长期被创得痛不欲生，痛定思痛也百思不得其解之后，只能无助地把这个问题归因于诅咒、玄学甚至阴谋论。
No, it has nothing to do with poverty. I, a Marxist warrior, have been tormented by this question for a long time, and after suffering and thinking hard, I can only helplessly attribute this problem to curses, metaphysics or even conspiracy theories.
其他答主有人举例说布莱顿和苏格兰有好吃的，没错，这就是问题关键。我发现世上食物最难吃的地方就在于伦敦及其周边的英格兰核心区，还要刨除掉伦敦受到外国人和外国文化影响的金融世界主义阶层的品位，要精准地剑指英格兰正圣乔治十字旗纯血旗人及其世代栖居地，被抬旗的名誉旗人和背叛十字旗物理跑路/精神出轨的旗奸不能算在内。这个污染地区这群纯血旗人的做饭难吃是一种非常神秘而深刻的、见多识广走遍全球也前所未见不可理喻的难吃。在今天，这种不可理喻已经发展到了不可名状的级别，我举以下几个例子，恐怖程度依次增加：
Some other answerers mentioned that Brighton and Scotland have good food, yes, that’s the key to the problem. I found that the most difficult place to eat in the world is London and its surrounding core areas of England, excluding the taste of the cosmopolitan elite in London influenced by foreigners and foreign cultures. To be precise, it is aimed at the pure-blooded flag people of the St. George’s Cross and their ancestral habitats. The honorary flag people who are raised by the flag and the traitors who physically run away/spiritually betray the cross cannot be counted. The cooking of this group of pure-blooded flag people in this polluted area is a very mysterious and profound, unprecedented and unreasonable difficulty to eat. Today, this unreasonableness has developed to an indescribable level. I will give a few examples below, with increasing horror:
一，不遵守任何已知的经济学定律。举例，你在英格兰旗人开的普通超市花2镑购买了一个平平无奇也无任何标记的普通石榴，你拿回家切开后发现这个石榴酸得不能吃；不是普通意义上的酸得不能吃，而是它在品种上是中亚地区人民拿来当柠檬/醋替代品的餐饮用黑籽石榴，一般是用来拌在抓饭里解腻提味的。如果你在淘宝上买石榴，这个品种的石榴是有小部分果农种的，专供特色餐厅/嗜酸的孕妇，在出售的时候会特意标注品种不同。有些果农两种都种，会在销售页面大字标识“这不是红籽甜石榴而是黑籽酸石榴，有些人很难接受，慎买勿随意差评”。
One, they do not follow any known economic laws. For example, you spend 2 pounds in a normal supermarket run by an English flag person to buy an ordinary and unmarked ordinary pomegranate. You take it home and cut it open and find that this pomegranate is sour and inedible; not in the ordinary sense of sour and inedible, but it is a black-seeded sour pomegranate used as a lemon/vinegar substitute by the people of Central Asia. It is usually used to mix with pilaf to relieve greasiness and enhance flavor. If you buy pomegranates on Taobao, this variety of pomegranates is grown by a small number of fruit farmers and is specially supplied to specialty restaurants/pregnant women who love sour food. When selling, they will specifically mark the variety as different. Some fruit farmers grow both varieties and will mark on the sales page “This is not a red-seeded sweet pomegranate but a black-seeded sour pomegranate. Some people find it hard to accept it. Please buy carefully and do not give bad reviews casually”. So you look at the black-seeded sour pomegranate in your hand and frown, feeling that this supermarket is not righteous.
你起身去英格兰旗人开的农产品集市上花5镑购买了一个有机石榴，打开一看发现依然是黑籽酸石榴；你再去英格兰旗人开的高端小资cottagecore风格精品生鲜食品店里买了一个9镑的硕大美观的石榴，合人民币八十多块钱，结账的时候店主温柔地冲你笑给你介绍新到货的石榴多么新鲜和可爱，还送给你一小袋本郡产的红茶，直到回家你打开这个石榴发现依然是个对部分人来说不可食用的黑籽酸石榴。你疲惫地瘫在沙发上，发现自己花了人民币一百五十块钱跑了两天只学到了一个道理，就是旗人的领地里只有黑籽酸石榴，就算你愿意出钱出到不合理的地步也只能买到黑籽酸石榴，旗人可能不承认人间有黑籽酸石榴以外的任何石榴，你要是想吃人间其他石榴你必须得离开旗人区找见多识广的绿哥店、三哥店和韩超。
You get up and go to the farmer’s market run by an English flag person and spend 5 pounds to buy an organic pomegranate. You open it and find that it is still a black-seeded sour pomegranate; you go to the high-end petty bourgeois cottagecore style boutique fresh food store run by an English flag person and buy a 9-pound huge beautiful pomegranate, which is more than 80 yuan in RMB. When checking out, the owner smiled gently at you and introduced how fresh and lovely the new pomegranates are, and gave you a small bag of tea from the county. It was not until you got home that you opened this pomegranate and found that it was still an inedible black-seeded sour pomegranate for some people. You collapsed on the sofa exhaustedly, realizing that you had spent 150 yuan in RMB for two days and only learned one truth, that there are only black-seeded sour pomegranates in the territory of the flag people. Even if you are willing to pay unreasonable money, you can only buy black-seeded sour pomegranates. The flag people may not admit that there are any other pomegranates in the world besides black-seeded sour pomegranates. If you want to eat other pomegranates in the human world, you have to leave the flag area and find knowledgeable Arabic shops, Indian shops and Korean supermarkets.
但是旗人超市冷藏区里那个全球都有的pom开头葫芦形瓶子的鲜榨石榴汁里又是正常的石榴汁，味道和品种和北美超市里的一模一样，它能一直存在说明销量还可以，你没法理解英格兰旗人是怎么调和这种认知冲突的，你也不敢细想。黑籽酸石榴格外好种吗？成本便宜吗？气候需求不同吗？可是淘宝上很多果农两种都种，黑籽酸石榴比红籽甜石榴售价还普遍每箱略贵十块钱呢。没有任何经济学原理能够解释英格兰这种现象。尽管这片土地诞生了亚当斯密和凯恩斯，但是你发现经济学不存在了。我甚至不禁怀疑莫非是因为这片土地上经常经济学匪夷所思地不存在所以能够诞生出反思经济学的亚当斯密和凯恩斯。
But the fresh squeezed pomegranate juice in the normal-shaped bottle with pom at the beginning in the refrigerated area of the flag person’s supermarket is normal pomegranate juice, which tastes and varieties are exactly the same as those in North American supermarkets. It can always exist to show that sales are okay. You can’t understand how English flag people reconcile this cognitive conflict, and you don’t dare to think about it carefully. Are black-seeded sour pomegranates particularly easy to grow? Is it cheap? Is the climate requirement different? But many fruit farmers on Taobao grow both varieties, and black-seeded sour pomegranates are generally slightly more expensive than red-seeded sweet pomegranates by ten yuan per box. There is no economic principle that can explain this phenomenon in England. Although this land gave birth to Adam Smith and Keynes, you found that economics did not exist. I even wonder if it is because economics often does not make sense on this land that Adam Smith and Keynes who reflect on economics can be born.
二，不受当地物产的物理限制。英格兰旗人是不太会做也不太会吃鱼虾蟹和其他水产的，尽管它是个岛国，开车到海边花不了三个小时，尽管它河道纵横，多数有历史的大学都以划船为乐。这种不太会做不太会吃不是你没见过人做，而是你在伦敦以外哪怕是个繁荣的小城市就会连买都买不到。在英格兰旗人开的超市里你是买不到有头有尾带骨头的鱼、带头带壳的生虾、更见不到生章鱼，就更别说新鲜的螃蟹和其他壳类水产了，就连海带都只有干货并被认为纯属日本特色。而且尽管英格兰气候温和，什么奇奇怪怪的花果都好活，但旗人只会把这些东西搜集到花园里，而从不出现在餐桌上。
Two, they are not limited by the physical constraints of local products. English flag people are not good at making or eating fish, shrimp, crab and other aquatic products, even though it is an island country, it takes less than three hours to drive to the seaside, even though it has rivers crisscrossing, most historical universities enjoy rowing. This kind of not good at making or eating is not that you have never seen people make it, but that you can’t even buy it outside London, even in a prosperous small city. In the supermarket run by an English flag person, you can’t buy fish with heads and tails and bones, live shrimp with heads and shells, let alone live octopus, let alone fresh crabs and other shellfish, even seaweed is only dry goods and is considered purely Japanese. And even though England has a mild climate and all kinds of weird flowers and fruits grow well, the flag people only collect these things in the garden, but never appear on the table.
英格兰旗人的食谱和做法总以一种很特殊的匮乏到无限接近于前中世纪黑暗时代的形式出现，就是你去纬度一样的比利时发现比利时人至少吃加香草的葡萄酒奶油炖青口和烧烤酱烤猪肋排，纬度一样的北部德国发现德国人至少吃纯肉香肠和大猪肘子，就连纬度一致的毛子区都有很香的土豆沙拉、罐焖牛肉、家常包菜汤和格瓦斯。我在英国待久了在瑞典转个机逛逛机场差点眼泪都感动得掉下来，机场里随便一个便利店卖的坚果居然不潮不苦没有哈喇子味很香脆，袋装糖果居然香精味不冲鼻子还软弹不粘牙，随便一个咖啡店卖的小面点居然不齁不干巴是好吃不腻的，咖啡居然不苦不烫是醇香的，这在旗人区想都别想，纯属做梦，我在英国被练得看到陈列着满满食物的橱窗第一反应不是嘴馋而是恐惧和反胃。
The recipes and methods of English flag people always appear in a very special form of scarcity that is infinitely close to the pre-medieval dark ages. That is, you go to Belgium with the same latitude and find that Belgians at least eat mussels stewed with vanilla wine cream and barbecue sauce grilled pork ribs. You go to northern Germany with the same latitude and find that Germans at least eat pure meat sausages and large pork knuckles. Even in the same latitude as the Russian area, there are delicious potato salads, canned braised beef, homemade cabbage soup and kvass. I stayed in England for a long time and walked around the airport during a transfer in Sweden. I almost shed tears of emotion. The nuts sold in any convenience store in the airport were not damp or bitter or saliva-flavored but crispy. The bagged candy was not pungent with artificial flavor and soft and elastic without sticking to the teeth. The small pastries sold in any coffee shop were not dry or hard but delicious and not greasy. The coffee was not bitter or hot but mellow. Don’t even think about this in the flag area, it’s purely dreaming. I was trained in England to see a window full of food and my first reaction was not greedy but fear and nausea.
我去埃及最南端边境跟动不动政变打枪的苏丹接壤的黑皮努比亚农家乐，发现这帮裤子都快穿不起的水库移民吃得比英格兰旗人好多了，塔吉锅慢炖到酥烂的骆驼肉比羊肉少膻味比牛肉多胶质，香料用得出神入化，烤鸽子肚子里填了米饭，米饭以外的鸽子皮肉的处理水平堪比一流水平的老广餐厅。穷得全村唯一一个饭店是预制板和木棍搭个露天棚子、铁皮凑合弯个烤炉、厕所是旱厕、开高速路过快饿昏了才会下高速瞅一眼的南美山沟沟里的小村庄都至少日常吃又嫩又多汁的烤猪肉片和新鲜的整条炸鱼，薄薄一层脆皮油香四溢，各种辣酱和柠檬调味，各路鲜榨果汁管够。
I went to the southernmost border of Egypt next to Sudan where there were frequent coups and gunfights. I found that these black-skinned Nubian farmers who could barely afford pants ate better than the English. The camel meat stewed slowly in a tagine pot was less smelly than lamb and more gelatinous than beef. The spices were used superbly. The roasted pigeon had rice in its belly. The treatment of the pigeon skin and meat outside the rice was comparable to that of a first-class Cantonese restaurant. The poorest village in South America where the only restaurant was an open-air shed made of prefabricated boards and wooden sticks, an iron sheet bent into a grill, a toilet was a dry toilet, and you would only get off the highway if you were hungry enough to faint had at least daily eaten tender and juicy grilled pork slices and fresh whole fried fish. A thin layer of crispy skin was oily and fragrant. Various spicy sauces and lemon seasoning. All kinds of fresh squeezed juice were enough.
英格兰旗人的调味汁只有gravy，也就是咸到发苦除了咸味之外没有任何味道甚至连肉味都没有的煮肉渗出来的血水再勾芡，在此之上狠加不是很新鲜也不是很大颗近乎无味的现磨黑胡椒甚至已经打碎不知道放了多久的黑胡椒粉。英格兰旗人可接受的食材只有猪牛羊鸡、整块无刺的一碰就烂的不新鲜鱼肉，煮到稀烂的水果。做法一定是煮熟/烤熟加gravy，腥得一端上来就能一波热浪逼得人战术后仰，或者裹面炸熟，面比内容物更厚更硬，一口下去剌得口腔黏膜出血。土豆、胡萝卜、洋葱，此外菜花一定煮不熟，豆角一定嚼得腮帮子发酸，青菜一定煮过，苦得让人怀疑人生，并且以上全都不调味。
The English sauce was only gravy, which was salty to bitter without any taste except saltiness or even meat flavor from boiled meat blood water thickened with starch. On top of this, they added heavily either not very fresh or very small almost tasteless freshly ground black pepper or crushed black pepper powder that had been stored for who knows how long. The English acceptable ingredients were only pork, beef, lamb, chicken, whole boneless fish meat that crumbled at a touch of un-freshness, boiled to mushy fruit. The method must be cooked/roasted plus gravy, fishy enough to make people lean back with a wave of heat as soon as they came up, or wrapped in flour and fried until cooked. The flour was thicker and harder than the contents, biting into it made the oral mucosa bleed. Potatoes, carrots, onions, besides cauliflower must be cooked raw, beans must be chewed until the cheeks were sour, greens must be overcooked, bitter enough to make people doubt their lives, and all of them were unseasoned.
饮料？咖啡、茶、酒，其中前两样都是进口的，而且只进最次的，或者说是旗人的口味只偏好最次的，咖啡永远是中药味，所有英国本土连锁咖啡店做咖啡都能给你做出滚烫正宗的中药味，茶永远是刷锅水高末，就连伊丽莎白二世生前最爱的那个高贵的蓝绿色牌子fortnum & mason也次得一口让人回想起二战的血火与荒凉。我都不好意思拿中国茶出来欺负人，就连土耳其的、意大利的、甚至巴黎老城区主业做巧克力的老字号甜品屋顺手做的支线产品伯爵茶都能吊打三大英国御用茶品牌全部加在一起。除了土产金酒之外好喝的酒全靠法国葡萄牙。
Drinks? Coffee, tea, wine, among which the first two are imported, and only the worst ones are imported, or rather the English taste only prefers the worst ones. Coffee is always medicinal flavor. All British local chain coffee shops can make you hot authentic medicinal flavor coffee. Tea is always pot-washing water. Even Elizabeth II’s favorite noble blue-green brand fortnum & mason was so bad that it reminded me of the blood and desolation of World War II with one sip. I’m embarrassed to use Chinese tea to bully people. Even Turkish tea , Italian tea , or even Parisian old town chocolate shop’s sideline product Earl Grey tea can beat all three British royal tea brands together. Except for the native gin, the good wine is all from France and Portugal.
英格兰是不产其他东西吗？不是的，虽然我花园百花齐放，地上河网密布，气候温和，生态极佳，但这一切跟我的餐桌有什么关系？我吃到类似水平的菜在全球只有撒哈拉沙漠里的帐篷民宿，从摩洛哥最南端的城市出发向南进沙漠开车三个小时走到高速公路尽头，再换吉普车骑着沙子开四十分钟的那种柏柏尔游牧帐篷。人那是不想做不会做吗？那是真的啥也不长，就这都至少要挣扎着拿橄榄和柠檬调调味。
Does England not produce anything else? No, although my garden is full of flowers, the ground is full of rivers, the climate is mild, and the ecology is excellent, but what does this have to do with my table? I ate something similar in the global only in the Berber nomadic tent in the Sahara desert. It took three hours to drive south from the southernmost city of Morocco into the desert to the end of the highway, and then changed to a jeep and rode on the sand for forty minutes. Are people not willing to do or not able to do it? That’s because they really don’t grow anything. They have to struggle with olives and lemons to season them.
我在从英国飞往美国的美联航飞机上吃到乘务组从美国带来的铝盒飞机餐盒饭感动得吃得一口不剩，因为这比全城九成的餐厅都要好吃。我在土耳其街头捧着骗游客的半生不熟的街边摊生烤栗子吃得头都不抬，我从国内来找我玩的发小尝了一口百思不得其解，我大喊这实在是太好吃了踏马的英国人不做这个这实在是太好吃了。英格兰正十字旗核心区松鼠和兔子满地蹦跶，鸭子和大鹅到处乱逛，在我老家种了就被冻死所以只能想想的果树在英国冬天连片叶子都不掉，但英格兰旗人非常擅长在没有困难种什么长什么捞什么有什么的环境里给自己制造极端的匮乏。
I ate the aluminum box airplane meal brought by the crew from the United States on the United Airlines flight from England to the United States and was moved to eat it all, because this was better than 90% of the restaurants in the city. I held a half-cooked street stall roasted chestnut that cheated tourists on the street in Turkey and ate it without looking up. My friend who came from China to play with me tasted it and was puzzled. I shouted that this was really delicious. The English didn’t do this. This was really delicious. The English flag core area squirrels and rabbits bounced all over the ground, ducks and geese wandered everywhere, fruit trees that would freeze to death in my hometown and could only be imagined did not even lose a leaf in winter in England, but the English were very good at creating extreme scarcity for themselves in an environment where there was no difficulty in growing what they planted and catching what they had.
三，规则类怪谈级别的干扰和妨害你的正常认知，使你怀疑自己的理智和精神状况。上面已经提过了，就像是石榴只有在伊朗被当醋用的黑籽酸石榴一样，你以为你在超市买到的是芒果、甜瓜、草莓、橙子、苹果、李子，啃一圈就能发现你买的是萝卜、萝卜、萝卜、萝卜、萝卜和萝卜，还是不甜不脆木了吧唧的萝卜，品质不错的国产水果萝卜可能都要比旗人超市里花里胡哨的各路水果要甜脆多汁一些。并且在旗人商店里这一点丝毫不为水果的售价而改变，除非你去中东人和三哥开的店里逃命，才能买到一点人间的东西。英格兰旗人店的水果不是阳光下的自然造物，而是物流业的悲惨残渣。
Three, rule-like weird tales level of interference and hindrance to your normal cognition, making you doubt your sanity and mental state. As mentioned above, just like pomegranates are only black-seeded sour pomegranates used as vinegar in Iran, you think you bought mangoes, melons, strawberries, oranges, apples, plums in the supermarket, but after a bite you find that you bought radishes, radishes, radishes, radishes, radishes and radishes, and they are not sweet or crisp but woody radishes. The quality of domestic fruit radishes may be sweeter, crispier and juicier than the flashy fruits in the flag person’s supermarket. And this point is not changed by the price of the fruit in the flag person’s store at all, unless you go to the Middle Eastern and Indians’ stores to escape, you can buy a little bit of human things. The fruits in the flag person’s store are not natural creations under the sun, but tragic residues of the logistics industry.
另外我在全世界吃到的牛排尽管有品质差异和厨师水平差异，确实至少除了某些廉价预制牛排之外都是牛肉的质地、口感和味道。我曾在旗人饭店里从便宜大碗的街区饭店到金碧辉煌的专业餐厅不信邪地尝试过很多块菲力牛排，20镑一块的牛排端上来，看起来和任何地方的牛排别无二致，叉子往肉里一叉准备切的时候，这块肉像一个肉丸子一样烂掉了，勉强塞进嘴里也像吃了一口肉丸子。30镑一块的牛排，叉子插进去烂掉了；50镑一块的牛排，叉子插进去烂掉了。
In addition, I have eaten steaks all over the world. Although there are quality differences and chef level differences, they are indeed at least beef texture, taste and flavor except for some cheap pre-made steaks. I have tried many fillet steaks in flag person restaurants from cheap big bowl neighborhood restaurants to magnificent professional restaurants. A 20-pound steak came up and looked no different from any other steak. When I forked it into the meat to cut it, the meat fell apart like a meatball. I barely stuffed it into my mouth and it was like eating a meatball. A 30-pound steak, forked in and fell apart; a 50-pound steak, forked in and fell apart.
牛排这种东西说到底不是什么非常高端的玩意，从经济史来看其实主打一个产业供应链规模经济，在美洲20镑就能吃到理应相当不错的，专业牛排馆30镑能吃得快乐升天，即便是在北上，花50镑这个价在正确的地方也总能获得一块正经货。但你人在旗人区只能不断用这些记忆提醒自己，牛排不是这样的牛排不是这样的牛排不是这样的，直到天长日久你总会忍不住怀疑自己记忆的正当性，你试了七八九十家店你愿意出越来越多的钱可你发现事情总是这样，
Steak is not a very high-end thing after all. From an economic history point of view, it actually focuses on an industry supply chain scale economy. In America, 20 pounds can eat a fairly good one. A professional steakhouse can eat happily for 30 pounds. Even in North America, spending 50 pounds at the right place can always get a decent piece. But you are in the flag area and you can only keep reminding yourself that steak is not like this steak is not like this steak is not like this until you will inevitably doubt the legitimacy of your memory over time. You tried seven or eight or nine or ten restaurants and you were willing to pay more and more money but you found that things were always like this.
所以五分熟的菲力牛排是不是真的就是叉子一碰就烂掉，也一滴肉汁都没有的大颗肉丸子啊？所以芒果甜瓜是不是真的就是萝卜味啊？什么是芒果？什么是萝卜？芒果？萝卜？世界上真的有芒果吗？世界上真的有萝卜吗？什么是菲力牛排？什么是餐厅？什么是食物？我是谁？芒果芒果芒果萝卜萝卜萝卜牛排牛排牛排丸子丸子丸子餐厅餐厅餐厅，我我我我我，石榴！萝卜！餐厅！萝卜！狮子头！啊啊啊！san值清零。
这对一个把吃口好饭当做起床和活着动力的人能造成多大的精神创伤你们能理解吗？
So is a medium-rare fillet steak really a meatball that falls apart when touched by a fork and has no juice at all? So are mangoes and melons really radish-flavored? What is a mango? What is a radish? Mango? Radish? Are there really mangoes in the world? Are there really radishes in the world? What is a fillet steak? What is a restaurant? What is food? Who am I? Mango mango mango radish radish radish steak steak steak meatball meatball meatball restaurant restaurant restaurant I I I I pomegranate! Radish! Restaurant! Radish! Lion’s head! Ahhh! Sanity value zeroed out.
Can you understand how much mental trauma this can cause to a person who takes eating a good meal as a motivation to get up and live?
英格兰的食物和餐厅看起来都是非常体面像模像样的。英格兰的旗人和文化也看起来都是非常体面像模像样的。英格兰的这类产业不是营销，而是传销级别。澳洲是英格兰流放犯了罪的人的地方，而英格兰是欧洲流放犯了罪的厨子的地方。我最后不得不痛苦地总结出了一个阴谋论，我认为英格兰早就被蜥蜴人污染了。一定是牛剑某个科学实验室的疯狂科学家引来了外星蜥蜴人，蜥蜴人早就替换掉了英格兰核心区的所有厨子甚至更多人，蜥蜴人在努力地扮演地球人，只要你扑上去撕扯他们的脸皮，他们就会露出布满鳞片的真容。不然怎么会所有的餐厅所有的食物都会像模像样地尽善尽美地端上来，但你一塞进嘴里就会发现出大事了，这不可能是人类做出来的东西，这不可能是人类接受和喜欢的口感和味道。
The food and restaurants in England look very decent and respectable. The flag people and culture of England also look very decent and respectable. England’s such industries are not marketing, but pyramid scheme level. Australia is the place where England exiled people who committed crimes, and England is the place where Europe exiled chefs who committed crimes. I finally had to painfully come up with a conspiracy theory. I think England has long been polluted by lizard people. It must be a mad scientist in a scientific laboratory at Oxford or Cambridge who brought the alien lizard people. The lizard people have replaced all the chefs and even more people in the core area of England. They are trying hard to pretend to be humans. As long as you pounce on them and tear their faces, they will reveal their true appearance covered with scales. Otherwise, how could all the restaurants and all the food look decent and perfect, but as soon as you put it in your mouth, you will find that something has gone wrong. This can’t be something made by humans. This can’t be the taste and flavor that humans accept and like.
这些蜥蜴人在努力制作人类平时在吃的东西，但他们认为只要复刻食物的外形和呈现方式就可以，因为他们根本没有人类的味觉系统，他们觉得吃起来都一样，甚至根本不吃人类概念上的食物。他们也根本没有拓展菜谱和做法的意识，因为他们降临地球的时候食物大致就是那个样子的，他们一直照做就可以了，因为自己不吃人类食物因此不能理解人类口味的逻辑和求新求变的想法，而且以他们的思维方式做创新菜会很容易被拆穿不是人类，可能会加入矿石、硅、辐射物或者不知道什么东西。
These lizard people are trying hard to make what humans usually eat, but they think that as long as they replicate the appearance and presentation of the food, it is enough, because they don’t have the human taste system at all. They think it tastes the same, or they don’t eat human food at all. They also have no awareness of expanding recipes and methods, because when they came to Earth, the food was roughly like that. They just had to do it all the time, because they didn’t eat human food so they couldn’t understand the logic and idea of human taste and change. And making innovative dishes with their way of thinking would easily expose them as not human. They might add ore, silicon, radiation or something unknown.
而且这是当代的新事吗？不是的。我看罗素晚年的访谈，他在爷爷家长大，家里提倡英格兰旗人典型的孩子净饿一饿身体才好，自己要常记先祖的艰苦朴素吃白肉，孩子更要严管。于是大人可以吃好东西，也就是苹果派，而小朋友罗素只能吃更简单的食物，也就是米布丁。小时候的罗素对大人的饮食垂涎三尺，然而英格兰的苹果派和米布丁有多难吃谁吃谁懂。
And is this a contemporary new thing? No. I watched Russell’s late interview. He grew up in his grandfather’s house. His family advocated that typical English flag children should be hungry for good health and always remember the hardships and simplicity of their ancestors eating white meat. Children should be strictly controlled. So adults can eat good things, which are apple pies, and children Russell can only eat simpler things, which are rice pudding. Russell as a child coveted the adults’ diet, but whoever eats English apple pies and rice pudding knows how bad they are.
那么罗素的爷爷是什么人呢？他家很困难吗？罗素家里次子，他的爷爷是约翰·罗素勋爵，两度出任英国首相，罗素的爸爸很早就去世了，给他哥哥留下一个伯爵爵位。那时候的英国是什么情况呢？罗素生于1872年，那是大英帝国的巅峰时代，1760-1840年第一次工业革命，1840年第一次鸦片战争，1848年英国皇家海军冒险队探索完全球从此人类的地理冒险基本结束，1851年第一次万国博览会，1860年第二次鸦片战争结束，1870年普法战争开始，从此世界上除了制海权问题之外才有了帝国主义，不列颠治下的和平第一次出现一丝裂缝，此前不列颠海军一直独霸全球各大洋贸易和军事航线，而1880年罗素在首相爷爷家吃着米布丁渴望苹果派，渴望到满头白发对着镜头还委屈到哽咽。这很难评，我没法评。
So who is Russell’s grandfather? Is his family very difficult? Russell is the second son of his family. His grandfather is John Russell, Lord Russell, who served as Prime Minister of Britain twice. Russell’s father died early and left an earl title to his brother. What was the situation in Britain at that time? Russell was born in 1872, which was the peak of the British Empire. The first industrial revolution from 1760 to 1840, the first Opium War in 1840, the exploration of the world by the British Royal Navy adventure team in 1848 ended the geographical adventure of mankind. The first World Expo in 1851, the end of the Second Opium War in 1860, the Franco-Prussian War in 1870 began, and imperialism appeared in the world except for sea power issues for the first time since then. A crack appeared in peace under Britain for the first time. Before that, the British navy had always dominated global trade and military routes on all oceans. In 1880 Russell ate rice pudding in his grandfather’s house as prime minister and longed for apple pie until he was full of white hair and choked in front of the camera. This is hard to comment on, I can’t comment on it.
英国菜难吃和穷人没有关系。英国菜难吃可能跟人类都没有什么关系。因为我实在不能理解也难以言喻，穷富不能解释，纬度不能解释，物产和气候不能解释，经济学不能解释，与其他文明的接触不能解释，就连工业革命、金融革命乃至一战二战，全都不能解释英国菜之难吃。我只能劝大家远离克苏鲁洼地。如果逃离河南是小润，那么逃离英格兰更是小润。不要和克苏鲁战斗，甚至不要试图想象和理解洼地，你会精神失常得一败涂地。为什么那么多人跑去英国拼命分享自己在克苏鲁洼地体面漂亮的生活？直视克苏鲁真相却离奇地没有疯狂的人，ta一定此前就是个精神病。
English food is not bad because of poverty. English food may have nothing to do with humans. Because I really can’t understand or describe it, poverty and wealth can’t explain it, latitude can’t explain it, products and climate can’t explain it, economics can’t explain it, contact with other civilizations can’t explain it, even the industrial revolution, financial revolution and even World War I and World War II, none of them can explain the difficulty of English food. I can only advise everyone to stay away from Cthulhu’s hollow. If escaping from Henan is Xiaorun, then escaping from England is even more Xiaorun. Don’t fight Cthulhu, or even try to imagine and understand the hollow, you will go insane and fail miserably. Why do so many people go to England and desperately share their decent and beautiful life in Cthulhu’s hollow? People who look directly at the truth of Cthulhu but don’t go crazy, he must have been a lunatic before.
归根到底，我认为英格兰饭不应该被称为难吃，而应该被判决为反人类罪。苏纳克上台的时候我击节叫好，并认为是一场伟大大换家事业的里程碑式的一步。如果一群类人生物占着一块物产丰富的珍贵的地球土地却不做相应的产出好好应用它的潜能反而把一切食材都污染成猪食，那么不如让给阿三，至少他们会煮很香的咖喱。
In the final analysis, I think English food should not be called bad, but should be sentenced for crimes against humanity. When Sunak (Indian) came to power, I applauded and thought it was a great step in a great "change of home" business. If a group of humanoid creatures occupy a piece of precious land on Earth with rich products but do not make corresponding output and use its potential well, but instead pollute everything into pig food, then it is better to give it to the Indians, at least they will cook fragrant curry.