Simple TypeScript pattern matching

examples.ts

const t1 = match(2) (_ => [
  [
    Number,
    _ => 'number!'
  ],
  [
    _ > 3,
    _ => _ + 3
  ],
  [
    _ == 2,
    _ => `asdasd${_}`,
  ],
]);

// t1 is 'number!'

const t2 = match('2') (_ => [
  [
    Number,
    _ => console.log('number!')
  ],
  [
    String,
    _ => console.log('string!')
  ],
  [
    Boolean,
    _ => console.log('boolean!')
  ],
]);

// t2 is undefined, logged 'string!'

match.ts

export type Matcher<T> = T extends Array<any> ? [
  boolean | Function | T,
  (...args: T) => any
] : [
  boolean | Function | T,
  (arg: T) => any
];

export type Match<T = any, M extends Matcher<T>[] = Matcher<T>[]> = (_: T) => M;

export const match = <T>(thing: T) => <M extends Match<T>>(f: M): ReturnType<ReturnType<M>[number][1]> => {
  const res = f(thing);
  
  for (const n of res) {
    const _ = () => n[1](thing);

    const success = (false
      || n[0] === thing
      || n[0] === true
      || (typeof n[0] === 'function' && ((typeof thing === 'object' && thing instanceof n[0]) || Object(thing) instanceof n[0]))
      || (Array.isArray(n[0]) && Array.isArray(thing) && n[0].length === thing.length && thing.every((_, i) => _ === n[0][i]))
      || (typeof n[0] === 'object' && (thing === n[0] || Object.keys(n[0]).every(key => n[0][key] === thing[key])))
    );

    if (success) {
      return _();
    }
  }
}