In the beginning God created radiation and ylem, And ylem was without shape or number, and the nucleons were rushing madly over the face of the deep.
And God said, "Let there be mass two." And there was was mass two. And God saw deuterium and it was good.
And God said, "Let there be mass three." And there was mass three. And God saw tritium and it was good.
And God continued to call numbers until He came to the transuranic elements. But when He looked back on his work, He found it was not good. In the excitement of counting, He missed calling for mass five, and so, naturally, no heavier elements could have been formed.
God was much disappointed, and wanted first to contract the Universe again, and to start all over from the beginning. But it would be much too simple. This, being almighty, God decided to correct His mistake in the most impossible way.
And God said, "Let there be Hoyle." And there was Hoyle. And God looked at Hoyle and told him to make heavy elements in any way he pleased.
And Hoyle decided to make heavy elements in stars, and to spread them around by supernova explosions. But in doing so, he had to obtain the same abundances which would have resulted from nucleosynthesis in ylem, if God would not have forgotten to call for mass five.
And so, with the help of God, Hoyle made heavy elements in this way, but was so complicated that nowadays neither Hoyle, nor God, or anybody else can figure out exactly how it was done.