FMyLife.php

<?php
	require "HTTParty.php";
	class FMyLife extends HTTParty
	{
		
		function __construct() {
			$this->base_uri = "http://api.betacie.com/view";
			$this->default_params = array("key" => "readonly", "language" => "en");
		}
		
		public function random()
		{
			return $this->get("/random");
		}
		
	}

$a = new FMyLife;
var_dump( $a->random() );

/*
	string(679) "<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>
	<root><active_key>readonly</active_key><items><item id="168595"><author>Sad</author><category>sex</category><date>2009-03-01T10:08:01+01:00</date><agree>14018</agree><deserved>65176</deserved><comments>52</comments><text>Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML</text><comments_flag>0</comments_flag></item></items><code>1</code><pubdate>2009-03-15T14:57:37+01:00</pubdate><language>en</language><errors></errors></root>"
	
*/
?>

HTTParty.php

<?php

	class HTTParty
	{
		
		public $base_uri = "";
		public $default_params = array();
		
		public function get($uri_path, $params = array())
		{
			// Build the URL to grab
			$uri = $this->build_url($uri_path, $params);
			
			// Grab the URL
			$raw_data = file_get_contents($uri);
			
			// todo: filter xml/json here
			return $raw_data;
		}
		
		private function build_url($path, $params = array())
		{
			return $this->base_uri . $path . "?" . 
			http_build_query(array_merge($this->default_params, $params));
		}
	}
	
?>