Kyle wrote this. Thanks, Kyle!

nuke_lambdas.rb

require('date')
require('json')

lambdas = JSON.parse(`aws lambda list-functions`)["Functions"]
delete_before_this_date = Date.new(2017, 2, 1)

to_nuke = lambdas.select do |lambda|
  !lambda["FunctionName"].include? "pipeline-orchestra"
end

to_nuke.each do |lambda|
  lambda_date = Date.iso8601(lambda["LastModified"])
  if lambda_date < delete_before_this_date
    function_name = lambda["FunctionName"]
    `aws lambda delete-function --function-name #{function_name}`
    print 'D'
  else
    print '.'
  end
end