Playing around with some data-mapper-esque orm nonsense and somehow pumped out this monster.

orm_wat.rb

  def translate_fields(field)
    mapping.invert.fetch(field.to_sym, field.to_sym)
  end

  def perform_query(sql, opts = {})
    results = get_records_from_query(sql, opts)
    columns = results.shift
    results.map do |row|
      model_attr_hash = Hash[
        column_names.map(&method(:translate_fields)).zip([nil] * column_names.count)
      ].merge(Hash[columns.map(&:method(:translate_fields))).zip(row)])

      model.public_send(model_meth, **model_attr_hash)
    end
  end