A birthday gift I got from my brother :)

birthday.php

<?php

	require 'classes/household.php';
	require 'classes/birthday.class.php';
	require 'classes/birthday.boy.class.php';
	require 'classes/friend.php';
	
	$K = new Birthday_Boy();
	
	foreach ( $K->check_phone()->check_im()->check_social() as $greetings ) {
		if ( $greetings->sender->location == 'Moscow' ) {
			$bring_present = $greetings->sender->got_present_last_year();
			$invited_friends []= $K->invite_over( $greetings->sender, $bring_present );
		} else {
			$thank_you_notes = $K->get_thanks_notes();
			$K->respond( $greetings, $thank_you_notes[array_rand( $thank_you_notes )] );
		}
	}
	
	$birthday_party = Birthday::party( $invited_friends );

	$presents = array();
	$birthday_party->fetch_presents( $presents );
	
	if ( sizeof( $presents ) ) ++$K->sadness;
	else {
		foreach ( $presents as $present ) {
			$present = $K->open( $present );
	
			if ( $present->health_after_opening() < 50 ) {
				--$K->excitement_level;
				--$K->strengh;
				if ( !$K->scissors ) $K->scissors = Household::get( 'Scissors' );
			}
		
			if ( Household::get( $present->get_class() ) ) continue;
			if ( $present->get_awsomeness_score() < 2 ) Household::get( 'Recycling_Bin' )->put( $present );
			else {
				if ( $present->is_funny() ) $K->laugh();
				if ( $present->is_food() ) {
					if ( $present->get_class() == 'Bacon' ) $K->eat( $present );
					else Household::get( 'Fridge' )->put( $present );
				}
			}
			++$K->hapiness;
		}
	}
	
	unset( $presents );
	
	$birthday_party->set_table( Household::get( 'Salads' ) );
	$birthday_party->set_table( Household::get( 'Drinks' ) );
	$birthday_party->set_table( Household::get( 'Food' ) );
	$birthday_party->set_table( Household::get( 'Desert' ) );
	
	$birthday_party->set_playlist( $K->get_favourite_playlist() )->play();
	
	while ( $birthday_party->is_running() ) {
		foreach ( $birthday_party->get_friends() as $friend ) {
			$friend->congratulate( $K );
		
			$friend->enjoy( $birthday_party->get_table() );
			$friend->enjoy( $birthday_party->playlist->get_current_track() );
	
			while( !$friend->drunk ) $friend->grab( $birthday_party->get_random_drink() )->drink();
		}

		foreach ( $K->get_family() as $family ) {
			if ( $family->get_name() == 'Gennady' or $family->get_name() == 'Nastya' ) {
				
				special_message( $K );
				
			} else $family->congratulate( $K );
		
			if ( $family->location != $birthday_party->location ) continue;

			$family->enjoy( $birthday_party->get_table() );
			if ( $family->age < 25) $family->enjoy( $birthday_party->playlist->get_current_track() );
		}
		
		if ( $birthday_party->get_neighbour()->has_called_police() ) $birthday_party->end();
	}
	
	$birthday_party->get_table()->clean( $K->get_wife() );
	unset( $birthday_party );
	
	while ( date('Y-m-d') != '2012-01-15' ) sleep( 60 );
	
	unset( $K );
	

	function special_message( &$K ) {
		$message = "
				Happy Birthday Konstantin!
	
							   *  *  *
							  *|_*|_*|*_
						  .-'`|* |* |*| `'-.
						  |`-............-'|
						  |                |
						  \   _  .-.   _   /
						,-|'-' '-'  '-' '-'|-,
					  /`  \._            _./  `\
					  '._    `""""""""""`    _.'
				   jgs   `''--..........--''`
	
	
				from Gennady and Nastya!"

		$stats []= $K->hapiness;
		$stats []= $K->love;
		$stats []= $K->prosperity;
		$stats []= $K->work_that_is_enjoyable;
		$stats []= $K->luck;
		$stats []= $K->knowledge;
		$stats []= $K->fun;

		foreach ( $stats as $index => $stat ) {
			++$stats[$index];
		}
		$wishes = &$stats;
		
		$K->send_message( $message, $wishes );
	}
	
?>