Change WordPress' nav menu items into custom links

wp_menu_items_to_links.sql

-- I was trying to turn WordPress' nav menu items into custom links so that I could
-- disable click painlessly
-- The "$list_of_ids" var-like thingy is just an abstraction of a list of INTs like "IN (1,2,3,N)"

UPDATE wp_posts AS A
INNER JOIN wp_posts AS B ON B.ID = (SELECT meta_value 
                                    FROM wp_postmeta 
                                    WHERE meta_key = "_menu_item_object_id" AND post_id = A.ID LIMIT 1)
SET A.post_title = B.post_title
WHERE A.ID IN ($list_of_ids);

UPDATE wp_postmeta SET meta_value = "custom" 
WHERE post_id IN ($list_of_ids) 
AND (meta_key = "_menu_item_object" OR meta_key = "_menu_item_type");

UPDATE wp_postmeta SET meta_value = "#" 
WHERE post_id IN ($list_of_ids) 
AND (meta_key = "_menu_item_url");