bsod_win9x.sh

#!/bin/bash

bsod_win9x() {
    NUM_COLUMNS=$(tput cols)
    NUM_ROWS=$(tput lines)
    HEADER_OFFSET_X=$(($NUM_COLUMNS / 2 - 4))
    HEADER_OFFSET_Y=$(($NUM_ROWS / 2 - 3))
    TEXT_OFFSET=$(($NUM_COLUMNS / 2 - 37))

    clear
    echo -e "\x1b[${HEADER_OFFSET_Y};${HEADER_OFFSET_X}f" "\x1b[30;47m Windows \x1b[0m\n"

    echo -e "\x1b[${TEXT_OFFSET}C" "An error has occured. To continue:\n"
    echo -e "\x1b[${TEXT_OFFSET}C" "Press Enter to return to Windows, or\n"
    echo -e "\x1b[${TEXT_OFFSET}C" "Press CTRL+ALT+DEL to restart your computer. If you do this,"
    echo -e "\x1b[${TEXT_OFFSET}C" "you will lose any unsaved information in all open applications.\n"
    echo -e "\x1b[${TEXT_OFFSET}C" "Error: 0E : 016F : BFF9B3D4\n"
    echo -ne "\x1b[$(($NUM_COLUMNS / 2 - 15))C"    "Press any key to continue "
    read -sn 1
    clear
}

bsod_win9x
trap 'bsod_win9x' WINCH