relative-time.php

<?php
function time2str($ts) {
    if(!ctype_digit($ts)) {
        $ts = strtotime($ts);
    }
    $diff = time() - $ts;
    if($diff == 0) {
        return 'now';
    } elseif($diff > 0) {
        $day_diff = floor($diff / 86400);
        if($day_diff == 0) {
            if($diff < 60) return 'just now';
            if($diff < 120) return '1 minute ago';
            if($diff < 3600) return floor($diff / 60) . ' minutes ago';
            if($diff < 7200) return '1 hour ago';
            if($diff < 86400) return floor($diff / 3600) . ' hours ago';
        }
        if($day_diff == 1) { return 'Yesterday'; }
        if($day_diff < 7) { return $day_diff . ' days ago'; }
        if($day_diff < 31) { return ceil($day_diff / 7) . ' weeks ago'; }
        if($day_diff < 60) { return 'last month'; }
        return date('F Y', $ts);
    } else {
        $diff = abs($diff);
        $day_diff = floor($diff / 86400);
        if($day_diff == 0) {
            if($diff < 120) { return 'in a minute'; }
            if($diff < 3600) { return 'in ' . floor($diff / 60) . ' minutes'; }
            if($diff < 7200) { return 'in an hour'; }
            if($diff < 86400) { return 'in ' . floor($diff / 3600) . ' hours'; }
        }
        if($day_diff == 1) { return 'Tomorrow'; }
        if($day_diff < 4) { return date('l', $ts); }
        if($day_diff < 7 + (7 - date('w'))) { return 'next week'; }
        if(ceil($day_diff / 7) < 4) { return 'in ' . ceil($day_diff / 7) . ' weeks'; }
        if(date('n', $ts) == date('n') + 1) { return 'next month'; }
        return date('F Y', $ts);
    }
}
?>