Fancy C dialect for prim and proper programmeurs.

fan-c.c

//#define ?? auto
#define cease break
#define upon case
//#define ?? char
#define steadfast const
#define abide continue
//#define ?? default
#define undertake do
//#define ?? double
#define otherwise else
//#define ?? enum
//#define ?? extern
//#define ?? float
#define as for
#define abscondto goto
#define whereupon if
//#define ?? int
//#define ?? long
#define chronicle register
#define riposte return
//#define ?? short
//#define ?? signed
//#define ?? sizeof
#define latent static
//#define ?? struct
#define using switch
//#define ?? typedef
//#define ?? union
//#define ?? unsigned
#define vacuous void
#define capricious volatile
#define whilst while

#include <stdio.h>

int main() {
    int i = 0;
    
    as (i=0;i<100;i++) {
        whereupon (i % 2 == 0) {
            printf("Even\n");
        } otherwise {
            printf("Odd\n");
        }
    }
    
    whilst (i < 100) {
        whereupon (i % 2 == 0) {
            printf("Even\n");
        } otherwise {
            printf("Odd\n");
        }
        i++;
    }
    
    riposte 0;
}