SublimeText.java

import java.io.IOException;
import java.net.MalformedURLException;
import java.net.URL;
import java.util.Date;
import java.util.Random;

import javax.xml.parsers.DocumentBuilder;
import javax.xml.parsers.DocumentBuilderFactory;
import javax.xml.parsers.ParserConfigurationException;

import org.w3c.dom.Document;
import org.xml.sax.SAXException;

public class Sublime {
	
	private Date time;
	
	private boolean isSmokingTwoJoints = false;
	
	private Runnable smoke = new Runnable() {
		@Override
		public void run() {
			isSmokingTwoJoints = true;
			for(int i = 0; i < 2; i++) {
				Joint joint = new Joint();
				while(!joint.isCashed()) { 
					joint.takePuff();
					try {
						Thread.sleep(2000);
					} catch (InterruptedException e) {
						System.out.println("Something is harshing your mellow.");
					}
				}
			}
			isSmokingTwoJoints = false;
		} 
	};
	
	public static void main(String[] args) { 
		Sublime sublime = new Sublime();
		sublime.startSmoking();
	}
	
	public Sublime() { 
		time = new Date();
	}
	
	public void startSmoking() { 
		smokeTwoJoints(); //Smoke two joints before smoking two joints
		if(isMorning()) { 
			//System.out.println("Morning");
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		if(isNight()) { 
			//System.out.println("Night");
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		if(isAfternoon()) { 
			//System.out.println("Afternoon");
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		if(isTimeOfPeace()) { 
			//System.out.println("Peace");
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		if(isTimeOfWar()) { 
			//System.out.println("War");
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		if(isSmokingTwoJoints) { 
			smokeTwoJoints();
		}
		smokeTwoJoints(); //And then smoke two more
	}
	
	private boolean isMorning() { 
		return time.getHours() < 12 && time.getHours() >= 8;
	}
	
	private boolean isNight() { 
		return time.getHours() > 18 && time.getHours() < 11 || time.getHours() >= 0 && time.getHours() < 8;
	}
	
	private boolean isAfternoon() { 
		return time.getHours() >= 12 && time.getHours() <= 18;
	}
	
	public void smokeTwoJoints() { 
		smoke.run();
	}
	
	public boolean isTimeOfPeace() { 
		return !getThreatLevel();
	}
	
	public boolean isTimeOfWar() { 
		return getThreatLevel();
	}
	
	private boolean getThreatLevel() { 
		final String feed = "http://www.dhs.gov/ntas/1.0/feed.xml";
		final String testFeed = "http://www.dhs.gov/ntas/1.0/sample-feed.xml";
		String threatLevel;
		DocumentBuilderFactory dbf = DocumentBuilderFactory.newInstance();
		DocumentBuilder db = null;
		Document doc = null;
		try {
			db = dbf.newDocumentBuilder();
			doc = db.parse(new URL(feed).openStream());
		} catch (ParserConfigurationException e) {
			// TODO Auto-generated catch block
			e.printStackTrace();
		} catch (MalformedURLException e) {
			// TODO Auto-generated catch block
			e.printStackTrace();
		} catch (SAXException e) {
			// TODO Auto-generated catch block
			e.printStackTrace();
		} catch (IOException e) {
			// TODO Auto-generated catch block
			e.printStackTrace();
		}
		try {
			threatLevel = doc.getElementsByTagName("alert").item(0).getAttributes().getNamedItem("type").getNodeValue();
		} catch (NullPointerException e) { 
			threatLevel = "No Threat";
		}
		switch(threatLevel) { 
		case "No Threat":
			return false;
		case "Imminent Threat":
			return true;
		case "Elevated Threat":
			return true;
		}
		return false;
	}
}

class Joint { 
	
	private int ganj_remaining = 100;
	
	public void takePuff() { 
		Random r = new Random();
		ganj_remaining -= r.nextInt(15);
		if(r.nextBoolean()) {
			System.out.println("Puff");
		} else { 
			System.out.println("Puff *cough*");
		}
	}
	
	public boolean isCashed() { 
		return ganj_remaining < 10;
	}
}