mostAnnoyingConsoleFunctionEver.js

(function(){
var log = console.log;

console.log = function(str) {
	var css = 'background: linear-gradient(to right, red, yellow, lime, aqua, blue, fuchsia, red); color: white; font-weight: bold;';
	var args = Array.prototype.slice.call(arguments);
	args[0] = '%c' + args[0];
	args.splice(1,0,css);
	
	var speech = new SpeechSynthesisUtterance();
	speech.text = str;
	window.speechSynthesis.speak(speech);
	
	return log.apply(console, args);
}
})();

I'll add some font-family:Comic Sans MS;font-size:13pt; like in my https://twitter.com/kentaromiura/status/443900362597351424, you know, for readability as the CERN tought us.